Hello friends,
I had a cousin called George who, when I was a kid, worked for WGN in Chicago. He was some kind of associate producer for shows like Bozo the Clown and The Phil Donahue Show. He could get us on the set of those shows and got my parents tickets to be in the audience of the latter. I seem to remember my mom even getting up and asking a question one time. I don’t remember who the guest was. Let’s just say it was a tennis star because that sounds right and she loves tennis still, so we’ll just go with that.
Anyway, one day George decided he didn’t want to associate produce anymore so he quit his job and became a flight attendant and went to see the world for free. He joked that he was “so gay, he had to become a flight attendant so everyone would know.” It was a funny joke and we laughed and he had fun. Later, when he found his person, he stopped traveling. They started a business and settled down. His mom, a devout Catholic, loved his person and called him “Georgie’s special friend” not because she didn’t know he was gay, but because they were adults and she didn’t like the term “boyfriend” and we didn’t use “partner” back then, because…Well, I don’t know why. Because we didn’t. I am not in charge of language, but I am a writer and this is a writer’s newsletter, so we will dig into words in just a few more paragraphs. Hang in there with me.
So, that is just how I grew up. I had several openly gay cousins and the guy who owned the local drug store (for whom I later worked as a teenager) was gay and so was the guy who owned a local pub and restaurant. These were just folks we knew and it wasn’t a thing. It was surely a thing for other members of our family and for other people in town, but for me, it just was what it was. I didn’t think about it. These were the folks I knew, or were related to, or who served me soda or sold me cigarettes for my dad (the 70s were wild).
Later, when the AIDS epidemic hit the country, it suddenly “became a thing.” It became normalized for people who were inwardly homophobic to be outwardly homophobic. Eddie Murphy did a whole bit about it in his smash comedy special Raw, something he admits now was wrong to do, but he was a cultural icon and it became much easier for people to use gay people as punchlines. People said, “That’s so gay” as a placeholder for “That is lame, or that is stupid.” It was bad.
Let’s break down the word homophobia for a moment, shall we? Homo, is Latin for man, but it really means people, not just men on the gender spectrum, but we can think about that word “man” here. Phobia is Greek for fear. So, that just means fear of men. To be homophobic, one is afraid of men or if one wants to be technical, one is afraid of all people. Are we really afraid of all people? Our current political climate makes it seem that we should be. Is that any way to live? To use another base meaning for a word that has a new meaning today, I find it very queer, (as in strange), that people want to live in fear. I certainly won’t live that way.
So, for this pride month, I’m going to be in charge of words and I am going to be gay and you should be gay too. Be happy for the people in your life who are any part of the LGBTQ+ community. Feel proud to know them. Have pride in them. I know I certainly am. Don’t be afraid. Fear makes us act irrationally and there is nothing irrational about a man who wants to kiss a man, or a woman, or a non-binary person, or even no one at all. That person is just a person. Just a man, who, unless he has raised his hand or his voice in violence or anger against you, or someone you know, does not deserve your fear. He doesn’t deserve to be called strange. He deserves to be gay and you, dear friend, should be happy for him. I am.
Notes from my Bookshelf
I just started Juno Dawson’s Her Majesty’s Royal Coven series. Oh man, I don’t know how I will get anything done for the next day. She pulls the reader in from the jump.
I picked up a new English translation of a German graphic novel from Oni Press called Parallel by Matthias Lehmann. It is about a man who has to keep his sexuality a secret right after WWII. It is honest and heartbreaking, but so, so good.
I received an ARC of an upcoming Buffy the Vampire Slayer prequel book about my favorite character from what is one of my all-time favorite shows, Tara Maclay. It is called The Bewitching Hour by Ashley Poston. She clearly loves Tara too.
I checked off Crime and Punishment from my bucket list. While I really, really disliked the main character, which is the sign of a well-written book. If it wasn’t good, I wouldn’t care. Still, that is going to be one and done for me. I don’t want to punish myself further.
Notes from my Keyboard
As I write this, the second book in The Austen Chronicles is at 91,000 words. I know what will be on the last page. That is exciting. I feel like I am rolling downhill and I should, if things go my way, be done with a good draft before July first! Of course, Lea, my first and last reader, will take a crack at it after I do my revisions and edits. I have a band of British folks who will give it a read as it takes place in England and I need to be sure I’ve nailed the lingo. Hopefully, by the time we meet here next month, I will have lots to share about my next projects.
Thank you again for subscribing and for all the support you’ve given me with the release of Welcome to Mansfield.
ARF
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